ARGH!!
ARGH!!
ARGH!!
i m BAKA!!!
wad was i thinking... spending more than 12 hours on econs and chem for review... i should have stopped at my maxim... no more fruits means no more fruits... no more output means no more output... learning this in econs and still cannot apply it to my own life... i guess im not learning at all... just mugging... in the end... i still cant meet my expectations my goal... i aimed at the sky... and by the time i reached the clouds... i started to fall... but i tried so hard to fly higher... it only caused me to fall faster... the additional steps i took was the additional burden and worries that i had to take... i guess the higher u fly, the harder u fall...
econs... had to 靠 mr paradi to help me in my exam.. though it gave me a push... im still so embarassed cause all the effort i put in boils down to nothing... thank you paradi.. without ur help... i dunno how much heavier my burden would be...
chem... it was relatively easy... i could have gotten my full marks.. if not for this dumb question... why?!?!... i should have trusted my gut... never did... BAKA!!!... wad have i learnt from past experiences... absolutely nothing...
furthermore... we had our chem assignments returned to us today... HELL!!!.. i dun understand why... i got like below 80% for my assignments... even if i had gotten full marks in my exam... i dun think that would be enough for my grades to up to 90%... damn it... because of one piece of sh*t... the entire foundation crashed on me...
AHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AH!!!!!!!!!!!!! AH!!!!
WHY ARE U SO UNFAIR?!?!... I PLACED MY TOTAL FAITH IN U... BUT WERE U EVER THERE!!! I TRY SO HARD... I BELIEVED IN THE WORDS OF MY MUM... THAT CAME FROM YOU... WHERE WERE YOU?!!?... mayb i cant blame u yet... the results have not been shown... i take my words back... im sorry for offending u... though i might be cryin right now... i do not seek ur pity because ur will is ur will... but please PLEASE give me the strength to carry my cross.... u know the burden weighs heavy me... please give me some sort of strength...
*sobs*
i will always love YOU, my ALMIGHTY FATHER
